A friend of mine recently experienced a string of deaths in her family. Her father, a cousin, followed by her uncle.
I've opened the obituary recently and found that an ex-colleague had passed away less than 2 weeks ago. As I looked at his photo, I remembered him as a generous, jovial, easy-going man whose face lights up like a little 5 year-old boy when he smiles or laughs though he's not that young. Calculating backwards from the age listed in the obituary, he must have been about 66 years old when I left my workplace. So he must have been about 52 when I first got to know him. Nice guy.
During Lent, our cell group had a lenten reflection, and one friend mentioned that he's afraid to be close to his spouse and his loved ones because it will be painful for him if they die before him and vice versa. When I heard that, I was kinda sad for him. What does it mean to not live life loving your spouse and your loved ones fully? My immediately reaction internally then was he'll be missing out alot in life and so will his wife. He and has wife have gone through ME, and he conceded that it's not fair to his spouse, so he's trying to overcome this natural protective instinct of his.
Recently, with all the news of death surrounding me, I now see what he means. When I go to sleep and look at Bert beside me, I feel kinda sad knowing that it's a matter of time that I will go, and so will he. As I look at my children, I know one day, they will die too. As long as we are born alive, we will all die one day. That's what the insurance slogan says...there's no certainty in life except the certainty that we will die one day.
It's a sad feeling for me. Makes me wonder what are we doing during the period when we are alive? Why are the kids struggling with studies, bogged down with homework, tuition and exams? Why are we bogged down with the demands and stress of working, deadlines, awful colleagues and demanding bosses? We are all like our pet hamster, locked within it's cage, running on the wheel at top speed but getting nowhere.
I for one, will try to make our family life a little more meaningful. Take time to slow down a little, go smell the roses. The kids are not young forever, nor are we. Don't take health for granted.
Don't keep on saving and being a scrooge. Invest your time and money wisely in creating memories and experiences with your family.
Just reflecting on life, it's meaning to me, and sharing them with you. :)
Love Theresa
