I had received an sms late last night from my aunt and bro informing me that my Godpa, Joseph Giam, had passed away on 18 Jan 2012. He's the same age as my dad - 95 years old.
But unlike my dad, he was still travelling by bus daily from his home in Changi to Marine Parade to have coffee with his friends at the coffee shop. He could see well and walk without aid. My mum said he espouse the importance of good diet....only fish and veg and a little rice. I must say, he had lived a high quality of life. Something I hope to aspire to in my old age, if I live that long!
He's passing away is so near the Chinese New Year. So his funeral would be held this Sat.
In the midst of the start of the new school year and the business of the preparations for the Chinese New Year, I felt a bit remorseful for not visiting him since my Godma passed away since I was a little girl. I guess with his huge gold-fish eyes that popped out further when he gets excited, and his booming loud voice, I was a bit intimidated by him. I never really talked to him, but I loved my Godma alot. I still miss her. But I am thankful that I faithfully sent him Chinese New Year cards every year since my mum commented "If you don't visit him during CNY, you must send him CNY", simply because she has stopped sending cards herself, so I had to take over it. It was nice to know he appreciates such gesture whenever we do meet at birthdays, and I always select really nice ones for him.
To think : he must have received my CNY card on the day of his death. How I know was because my god-daughter received hers on the 18th and I had sent all my cards out on the same day. It was a calendar card with the zodiac dragon with 3-D flower pattern on the cover.
I teared to think of his passing away. Maybe I should have visited him last year or the years before that. But without my mum being mobile, I really do not know what to say to him if I had visited him. What I can only do now is to pray for the repose of his soul and that my dear and beloved godma, Lian Fah, would embrace him when he goes to heaven to be with her again.
His passing away made me stand back to look at life. Our mortal life here on earth is very brief. When I nag at the children to do their revision and homework, did I take time to love them as gifts from God? When was the last time I had looked into their eyes and love that little spirit and soul inside them? What are my priorities in life? It actually all boils down to making time to build meaningful personal relationships with those who you really love and care for.
So before it is too late, take the opportunity of this CNY holiday to really spend quality time with the ones you love. Forget about the hassle of cooking the most elaborate and expensive dishes, or fretting about keeping the house spick and span, or worrying about not having enough freshly minted crisp notes for the ang pows, for if you strip away all these matters, we should remember that man is not made for rituals but rituals for man. We should be like Mary in the Gospel story of Martha and Mary, and choose to give your full attention to people rather than fuss about laying the best dishes for the occasion.
Have a blessed Chinese New Year re-building bonds and friendship with your love ones.
Love Theresa
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